A great moment to remember

and of course im late to wish everyone Merry Christmas ~ but hey ~ its time to be jolly =D!!!

                 thanks for making my day =D!..

well the worst of the week is over..luckly the performance wasn’t that horrible as it seen >.< but regardless of the shitness happened again and again..it seems to hurt less but yet thinking about that..really drop my mind into consideration of where to put my faith in….but at least I know I have a few people I can put my faith in always =D!

and an unexpected gift from my roomate..my friend =D!

thanks for the coffee mike!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!xD!!!More adrenaline!! hehe

cant wait for the new year..=D!

Betrayal

                                             *sigh*…..

Sometimes we always here this a lot..like people backstabbing other people and etc.Usually and most of the times..the victim is unaware and it strikes down hard and painfully…Its normal for every person to felt this pain and suffering..but sometimes its really unexpected…from unexpected people too..especially knowing they WERE the people you care about.

I knew thought this would happen to me.

    I stood up for them when nobody could do it..

           I stood for them when they need it the most..

                 I took the blame when nobody can take it...

                        I charge the front for them when nobody wanted too..

but…when I need them the most,all I get from them was…..

                                   total…

 

                                                        silence…and nothing else..

No..it was the pain from the teachers screwing me,it wasn’t the fact they scared..it wasn’t that I was being ignorant..but it was disappointment and betrayal..at that moment..I couldn’t control myself..I felt so angry..yet so sad at the same time..from that moment..I really thought for myself…it keep repeat in my mind what to do next..

“Did stood up for the wrong people?..”

                                    “What did I do wrong to deserve this?..”

“Forgive and forget?..”

                                       “Revenge or let it go?.

They didn’t know..didn’t felt anything..a share of concern? ..too late..

Well..I take this as a lesson..Forgive and forget..I can forget this..but forgive..that won’t happen.A wound forms a scar..and that scar..won’t go away.A senior once told me before..

“You don’t need many friends,you just need true friends only”

                                                                         thinking about it….

but I do know 1 thing I am sure about..I not be standing up for anyone else other than myself and my real friends..

A man of his words

A found this in my latin book

     '” Vir Vebra “

It means a man of his words..I find it amusing and true.Many people nowadays made promises which never kept.I too admit I made promises which I couldn’t keep.Sometimes its not only promises which we can keep.even a little saying could be.I feel this quite often happening to me..

                      

                                           shattering aint it?

sometimes its really frustrating and nerve-racking.I really wonder,is it so hard to ask something?? or is it really so hard to admit that “yes I don’t know” rather than “No I don’t know”..what is so hard about it? please think about it. this is just an example.

Its true the saying “Its easier said than done”…but yet ther times its just that..people always say things which they intend to do …but never done..which they never knew that sometimes..or most of the times..other people depended on that the action they speak of so proudly..when you ended doing it yourself..soon to realize that “what was bloody point of even saying it in the first place??” so that have the good impression of other people?? so that can be always on top on someone else?

I realize this a long time ago..but some didn’t.Only a few really kept it..a few…Sometimes I feel like giving up them and just ignored them..but it seems just so hard..balance between a friend and nuisance … I really wished …I wasn’t pinned down by this..

Boundaries….

What a sad a realization how limited time I have…when the time came I wasn’t there.Had a long chat with my friends.Was practicing the guitar while my friend suddenly ask me “why didn’t learn even more other instrument to play? ….and I just like *stunned!*

Shouldn’t had wasted those times..been a while didn’t felt the feeling to keep playing something you like.Maybe because I realize this could be another way for me to express my personal life and problems through music..That usually works fine for me through piano and squash.. Looking through all my genre songs..it changes dramatically…I really like J-rock songs..as it really something I felt.

look..a rocker can make such melodic music….

I felt this like another escape from reality..Listening is just not enough..Playing is just even better..but have to learn it the hardway.But everyone have its boundaries..I hope im just now pushing it…1 day I really hope I can master this instrument..within this 6 years..hopefully..

Well I don’t really expect you all to understand how I felt about this.Not many people have to urge and drive to go for it when comes to music.I hope can have my own set 1 day.. =D..well at least im still keeping 1 part of me still the same…being different =P!

bacteria!!!

Ok…I am bit crazy..due to fact have to remember and give a presentation about the whole thing about bacteria and the craps it have..=.=..ya I know,compared to those done by my seniors this is less than it seems.So far did quite well for anatomy =D! quite happy with it.Seems I learned something *like I didn’t!* lol!

Soon I can play perfectly the cover for Versailles – Shout and bliss.Might even do video depending of the time I have~ LOL!!…I shall let time do the talking when it comes.

Frozen time..

                                             so time goes on a hold…

So comes the time of the year where everything is in a sudden chill..yes im talking about Winter. Wow..seriously is the only word I can think of right now.,All of the sudden,on my way to morphological department  for my lectures..its was just cold..after lecture..there is …snows…and its like a freaking tundra .Its snow so heavily.

                                              let it snow,let is snow………..

The weird thing is..its just the 3rd day of winter..which last year was still quite warm..Food for thought..right now..Moscow is almost –20..and Saint Petersburg is almost –26..how about Volgograd?

well..luckily…its now –12…and still going down…lol!!

All I can say is…Lets Hibernate!! lol!!!

Been a interesting weekend =D!