Autumn blues…

               a green and a yellow…..

So yes im bored as you can see frequent bloggingLOL!.Well its true i felt i can relax once in a while..Pictures like this give me reasons to keep on going =D!! Thought been difficult as recently been so far “Challenging” I think its time for me to release another dream of learning another musical instrument =D!!!

maybe by next month will get myself an electric guitar.I have to exclude my earlier plan of getting a violin as its very erm annoying to play it in such a erm…how to put it.. “PACKED” environment xD!I! i need to take things easily and need to calm down >.< felt like since last year things been goin just too fast.LoL! seriously i wish got the Time Remote control like in the movie “Switch” xD!!! *click*! paused everything~ ….wishing and wishing..>.<

                                  and so the fight goes on…….

Congratulation!

 

Well its been a while i blog happy thoughts rather than the usual hate,complains, and etc and etc.Since today wasn’t such a bad day and not everything goes according to plan but i still want to wish you again bro,Congratulation =D!!!hopefully will get to join you next year >.<!!! lol! *still dreaming*   xD

 

                     one day….hopefully..if im not dreaming xD!!!!

Though getting this is no easy task.For some that don’t know what is it.Its like our Malaysia Hari Cemerlang.If literal translation means same thing also.Getting straight excellent marks for exams are no easy task and look at all of them!!! =D!! *erm those that wore formal clothes are the ones who got it by the way xD not all lol!*

          Congratz!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=D!..

Well learned lesson

Well didn’t expect that to happen that day but goes to show everyone.Not everyone agrees with everything and there are people just don’t know when to give up and shut up.I felt this year is by far the most problematic year i seen regardless of great good deeds of my seniors who helped us all to stay in our old hostel =D! *thanks you guys!* I find that its time to takes things easy d.No point in wasting my time stressing over the thing which im learning like literally every single day.Learnt from a great senior xD!One of the most relaxed person i seen by far.

Oh ya Happy Belated birthday you 2 !!! =P

            Hope you guys have a great time =D!!

No matter what happen.I will not,i repeat i will not let her dictate my life or ruin my whole first year because of her!.I don’t you to compared me with other people else.I am who i am thats all!.Don’t test me..

changed??

                Autumn………….

After returning here about 3 weeks d..i noticed..There are changes among us which only a handfull noticed.I personally felt it the most in the not a pleasant way.Ya this lately been complaining about the stress im going through.It really does make or break a person here.I really wish it was just like last time where at least most classes ends with a smile on the face “ =D”..

I felt like im lost somewhere again..=.=.In class i really didnt expect the same thing happen again like last time.I was so pissed until at point for the momentary just let go myself.Not proud of what i said though.Sometimes i wonder is it really my fault?? or not..

Though the are happy moments like this =D!

I find myself nowadays pinned down..broken..i sometimes even like just didnt noticed whats happening around me(haha ya blurring).keeping up with them is not an easy task knowing my own limitation..I really need to straighten up myself soon before i break down again..and hope can still hold in ..

  “Anger is better than the spear”

                                                                      Ceaser.

i hope not…

A new stress…

 

Being back here didnt really gave me much hope d as i continue on.Catching up in class with like 4 super-geniuses its incredibly hard.They might not noticed but they don’t feel the pressure and stress as much as i do..especially when it comes to language..im never strong or interested in language other than the wan which i like myself.Learning foreign language is never easy and it takes time..like years!! not in a few months time..others pick up very fast but IM NOT THEM!…so please dammit..give a break already will you..im here to learn whats there to be learned to be a doctor..Not some kind of linguist .Language is something which takes TIME! which your NOT GIVING ME!

The tension build up in class is really nerve-breaking.Its hard enough just to keep it to myself.No point of telling them.None of them understand how stress i feel in class.When your in my position you will know how i feel right now,every single class your screwed one way or another,never get a chance to have a break,always the no.1 target.I am really really close to point of “returning fire” d but i hold my ground caused this is really an unnecessary problems i really don’t need now.I mean like for everyone feels the same way..”The more you hate something,the harder it is to accept it the way it is”..Same goes to this,the more i hate it,the harder for me to learn it

.Every single freakng day,i always get such “FANTASTIC” compliment like “Your the worst in class” or “Whats wrong with you??why cant you pick up like others?” or my personal favourite “why can’t you learn?”.Its not to say im not trying,i really do tried and i really do study but its just..i can digest all of this in such a short time and i need time to think.

*sigh* though this post is just pure and simple complaint and hatred and stress relieve,i find this a way for me to express what is going on in my life which very few people knew about.This point,i really really wish,i can just change or transfer.I really feel im jus wasting my time but at least there are some friends i really i can talk too about this.

I really wish i can just skip this 2 months,6-7 hours of just Pure language class i really..really too intense.Please will you just leave me alone..i just want to be alone……